I Suppose I Should Tell You Something About My Life Now

by KYLE SEIBEL

Leila died last week, that’s the big update around here. We knew it was coming, but it was still hard when we heard it.

I went for a jog right after we got the call, which is something I never do. Abbie had to ask me twice where I was going.

I was down along the beach, that multi-use path parallel to Cabrillo, because I thought it would be nice to watch the waves crash, you know? I was looking for something that could plug me back into the universe, if that makes any sense. The truth is I wasn’t really jogging per se. It was more like a shuffle.

I’m not, if you must know, in great shape. And yes, I was making sure to not bump into anyone or step in any dogshit, but I was elsewhere. You know how I get. My own little world.

Of course I was thinking about Leila. This one time specifically. She had come to stay with us during the summer when we were kids. Dad got tickets to the ballgame and even back then—25 years ago at least—she wasn’t so good on her feet and our seats were way up there and…